Sunday, December 25, 2011

Predictions For 2012

* Obama will win reelection for 2 reasons. 1. America is on a slippery slope and handouts are winning. People are giving up and just accepting payouts from the government, which is exactly what Obama wanted. 2. The fix is in. This will be the most corrupt election in American history. Chicago style tactics will be used in the swing states, the union will be out in force, and lots of convicts, illegal aliens, and dead people are going to somehow mysteriously be able to vote. Do not doubt me on this.

* Due to lack of ratings Television will start to lift the ban on language and nudity. Television will be without any substance, merit, or usefulness.. all creativity gone since the mid-90's.

* More protests and riots. None of which will involve the Tea Party. Smelly wannabe hippies will climb out of their parent's basements to come out and trash your city and defecate on our sidewalks all in the name of.. Oh they forget why.

* The Tea Party membership will start to grow slowly. Maybe even become a separate ticket as the Republican party starts to blend in more and more with the Democrat party.

* Ron Paul followers will build a golden statue in his honor and pray to their leader. Then they will pat themselves on the backs as they smugly talk about Keynesian economics and mock the "sheeples". And once again their relevance will be non-existent.

* Nancy Pelosi will finally read the Obamacare bill and quickly decide to opt herself out when she finds out what's in it.

* Romney will win the "Republican" nomination, and will pray you ignore his record of being decidedly anything but Republican.

* Whoopi Goldberg will continue to be the most disgusting woman to ever be allowed to be on a television show. She'll say things to shock you, as if her appearance weren't enough.

* Green Bay wins the Superbowl.

* The NBA title will be won by.... Oh wow.. who cares.

* Tiger Woods will win at least one major title. Maybe.

* Some Canadian dudes that we borrowed will win the Stanley Cup.

* Ronald Reagan, Abraham Lincoln, Winston Churchill, George Washington, Martin Luther King, Thomas Jefferson, Teddy Roosevelt, and many others will continue to cause earthquakes across the world as the repeatedly and constantly roll over and over in their graves.

* And finally, and most importantly.. Jesus Christ will continue to reign supreme as our only hope and our Lord and Saviour. Come Lord.. Even now!

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