Yep folks.. It's that time again!
We're hoping to get car washes to put up a sign that says, "THIS CAR WASH CAN CAUSE FEAR."
(About Jay Leno) He's a strange man. He's a strange man with strange cars. He'll dri-drive down the street waving at you behind the wheel of a Stanley Steamer. He-he's a-a strange man.
Phil: You see how stupid you sound?
Steve: No, sir, I do not.
Phil: You puttin' me on?
Steve: What did the hat say to the man?
Phil: Are you putting me on?
You can't expose me to the gayability.
I'm psycho, and so are my bros.
When it gets tough, I go to the rifle!
We're ooh-rah. We're ready to fight and die for this country. But first, we want to smoke dope and shoot heroin.
I frolicked out of the closet and found my Gay Eye.
If I get my name on a Desperate Housewives show, it says, "Doug Dannger, comma, gay."
I wanna get right up into an insurgeants nest and watch as the bullets seer through their faces... through the back of their heads and through another guys face.
Do you think there's a sign where the chickens live that says, "Don't choke the chicken"?
Are you for real?
If you were here, you wouldn't have any eyes left.
(arguing with a caller) No, you're a liar. Liar. I hate you so deeply.
(referring to her friend's hairy children) Phil, it looked like Playground of the Apes.
Oh, you're sitting there staring at your cheaply manicured nails in your Ford Taurus...
I walked in the back door and saw Amanda, my daughter, with a piece of chocholate cake and shoving it from the palm of her hand into her mouth, and...and I had been outside raking leaves, and i hit her with the rake and knocked it out of her hand and said "How Dare You?" Thats how much I love her. Thats really how much I love her.
And my current favorite...
What? My landing gear's still down and my tires are crooked? Ah, screw it, I'm bringing it in anyway.