Saturday, October 13, 2007

Reasons Not To Vote For The Democrats

* Questioning their lack of patriotism is fun and honest. If you vote for them it gives them the false sense that they actually are patriotic.

* I like saving babies and I like killing whales. Democrats like the opposite.

* Supposedly they are the smart ones... However studies have shown that they are only smart enough to find ways to fool themselves into thinking they are smarter than they really are. And that's not smart.

* They hate Walmart. Walmart owns Sam's Club. Where else would I find the 55 pound drum of mayonnaise that I so desperately need?

* Hillary Clinton is a snobby, yellow bellied, pinko, commie. Plus she shot my uncle. I can't vote for that.

* Hippies smell.

* Be honest, who would you rather hang out and play cards with...George Bush or Hillary Clinton? Sure Hillary Clinton might be a better talker but you know she cheats at Uno. GWB just seems more fun, he messes up words like I do, he's human. I wouldn't have to keep checking if my wallet were still there all night.

* Most democrats would sell their first born child into slavery if it gave them one more percentage point of your hard earned tax dollar. I wish I were joking about that one.

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