I'm thinking about becoming a WWF wrestler but I can't find a unitard that fits plus I'm not sure if the name the "The Stigall-i-nator" is really all that tough sounding.
Now I have the respiratory flu. I had the stomach crud last week and now this. What's next...rickets or scurvy??
A few days ago on the Price Is Right an older woman was spinning the big wheel and after a big spin she lost her balance and fell and hit her head on the wall next to the wheel....true story. The only thing I could think of was...Finally! After all these years my loyal watching of the PiR finally just paid off!
If I were on the Price Is Right and I made it to the big wheel I would walk up and spin it backwards...I just want to see how angry Bob would get.
Yeah, I could've played in the NFL...But I gotta stop living in the past and think of the future.
I completely regret joining the Russian mafia.
That new Spangles commercial with the corny song is so annoying that every time I hear it I want to run out of my apartment and just start punching people in the face....Just like when I bite my tongue.
Every year Dick Clark has the the most trendy pop bands on his 'Rockin New Years Eve'. I think it'd be hilarious if they had a metal band on there. Just once I would love to hear Dick Clark say..."That was Hillary Duff with her latest hit and now ladies and gentlemen here's Cannibal Corpse."
When I had a fever last week during my bout with the flu I was starting to get delirious. At one point I was convinced that I heard my computer sneeze.
There is an old Russian proverb that says, "Â ðåçóëüòàòå óäàðà âîéñê" and I really try to live my life by it.