Tuesday, February 27, 2007

The Goals Of A Simple Man

I have had certain goals that I strive for. Some of them I make more attainable than others. That just makes the challenge more fun. The joy is in the journey..Am I Right? So here are my life's goals that are as yet to be checked off...

1. Bring back the Macarena.

2. Become the first blind African-American to play pro football.

3. Ask for a Diet Coke at a funeral.

4. Find one of those balloons from a balloon launch in my yard. You know the ones with the name and address of a hopeful child who launched it hoping to get a response back from far away.. Anyway, my comments back to the kid would say.. "PLEASE KEEP YOUR TRASH OUT OF MY YARD!" It's still littering even if it's from 500 miles away.

5. Head to the library and go up to people who are studying and ask them if they want to be study buddies. Then when they say, "but I'm not even in the same class you are." I'd say.."that's right buddy, and don't forget that!" Walk away slowly.

6. Towel snap a monk.

7. Be the first to drive a golf cart across the Gobi desert...in a sweater.

8. Attend a Diane Bish concert (She's an organist that has sparkly outfits and has a show on PBS), and keep hitting her sheet music with one of those laser pointers. When she gets mad enough just run out screaming "No one likes the organ anymore!!!"

9. Eat less glue.

10. Ask Renee Stevens personally for a Shpangles gift shertificate...When she asks how much I want the amount to be I'll say..Sheventy five dollarsh, pleash.

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