Thursday, July 06, 2006

Let's See How My Predictions For 2006 Have Turned Out...

Early on in the year I made some big predictions for 2006. How many have I gotten right so far????

* Disneyland's annual "gay day" at the park will be extended to include a transvestite day. Children will be confused as to whether Mickey or Minnie is giving them a hug.

* Mr. T will go into hyper mode after he decides that in 2006 he will pity more fools than ever before.

* Tookie Williams will rise from the dead and kill us all.

* After having successfully distracted the U.S. with their Sudoku puzzles the Japanese will attack.

* Historians will declare that Walk Like An Egyptian is the stupidest song ever written.

* The makers of Yoohoo chocolate drink will celebrate their 20th sale.

* In a clerical error Gary Coleman will receive a Kennedy Center Honor.

* In an effort to appeal to the high percentage of overweight children, Sesame Street will introduce a new character. It will be Big Bird's cousin, Big Boned Bird.

* The Democrats will theorize that George W. Bush caused World War I after they reveal that he was the one that assassinated Archduke Franz Ferdinand.

* The U.S. government will introduce a new program designed to ease overcrowded prisons... Any prisoner can be set free if they agree to be roundhouse kicked one time by Chuck Norris. There will be no takers.

* Pat Robinson will declare that anyone who doesn't send the 700 Club 500 dollars will experience the wrath of God...everyone decides to take their chances. (Why is anyone still watching that show...Don't be so gullible!)

* There will be massive earthquakes, tsunamis, famines and wardrobe malfunctions.

* Richard Simmons will grow his afro to 3 times the legal limit.

* Out of boredom George W. Bush will use his weather machine to thaw Antarctica.

* Left Behind 4 will win 4 Golden Globes and 7 Oscars. The new McGee and Me movie will be ignored.

* The Life And Times will be voted second best blog by the organization known as The Internet For The Illiterate and Blind Society.

* Yo Momma.

Ok, so I'm no prophet!

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