1. The tent that sold it to me -- They are negligent in the fact that they sold me a defective firework that went horribly askew and bludgeoned me in front of my friends.
2. The Chinese man who made it -- Sure, he makes 5 dollars a month working in a sweat shop...but I need compensation.
3. My parents -- They hosted the party that made conditions right for a firework celebration. They were responsible for even the possibility of it happening.
4. My friends -- You know who you are! Not one of you made any attempt to stop the rogue firework from smashing itself into my precious skin. Most laughed hysterically while I writhed in pain and screamed like a girl. See you in court!
I will prosecute with extreme prejudice!