Friday, January 13, 2006

Ted Kennedy's Head Reaches Dangerous Size

Scientists expressed concern Thursday at the overall circumference of Ted Kennedy's head.
"The earth is starting to tilt on it's axis and it's rotation seems to be slowing at a dangerous rate.", Biologist and astronomer Dr. Peter Fitz told TLAT. "The gravitational pull from his giant throbbing melon will kill us all if we don't get it under control."
Earlier last year scientists and biologists came to the conclusion that Kennedy's head was so large because it was filled with thirty percent scotch and seventy percent bad liberal ideas. This seems to be causing the expansion.
President Bush has offered the full cooperation and resources of the federal government.

1 comment:

Dreamspinner said...

He stores nuts in his cheeks..or martini olives?